Jonathan Quick trains for the Olympics

Bleacher Report recently posted an extremely important video of goaltender Jonathan Quick training to get ready for the Kings season and Olympic year. Since the video isn’t embeddable, making a series of GIFs to bask in the, uh, artistry of it all seems just as imperative.

Recommendation: play Salt N’ Pepa’s “Push It” right now, as you scroll.

The video opens on really the only shot one can choose in times like these — highlighting Quick’s backside.

Yep. He’s buckling himself into whatever you call that thing. What I’ve learned from watching training videos in general is that I have no idea what anything is called. Exercise, whatever. I don’t get paid enough money to do it.

Another thing I learned from watching this video in particular is that Quick makes funny faces when he runs on a treadmill.

What is going on with your mouth?

Don’t let expending all that energy fool you. He’s still an expert at doing interviews while looking like someone woke him up just four seconds prior to putting a camera in his face.

Napping sitting up.

But, really, he’s full of life. He can do all kinds of exercises, half of which confuse me. There’s some very essential and basic weightlifting:

Then there’s whatever this is that athletes have to do in super slow motion and in black and white:

It’s important to take breaks in between activities, towel off, and smile at someone off camera as well.

Damp b-roll.

But then it’s back to business. This time, outside!

As Quick shows the camera his tummy, his interview voiceover explains that, though he was on the 2010 USA team at the Vancouver Olympic games, he didn’t play a minute. He got a silver medal for showing up. In 2014, he’s hoping to get some ice time. Let Jimmy Howard warm the bench. He doesn’t say that, but that’s what will happen. Everyone knows it. Coach Dan Bylsma still isn’t saying whether Quick gets the starting job or Ryan Miller, but if Quick is named the number one, it’ll make him feel soft-focus smile good.

That’s pretty much it for now. To thank everyone for watching him sweat and prepare for Sochi, Quick takes a few more sleepy moments to sign your face.

Don’t sell this on eBay, buds.

End scene. Quality documentary work!!

If you’re thinking that I used this as an excuse to post gratuitous GIFs of Quick, you’re right. But you made it to the end, didn’t you? So, who’s the sucker now?